Don Moses Comedy & Magic Blog - A light hearted look at life, comedy and magic.

Tuesday, September 11th, 2007 at 1:10 pm

Pain threshold

I did not sleep very much last night, as I had my hernia operation yesterday.

By the way, the more observant of you will have noticed that I have missed a week of blogs.  Well, I feel I am doing so well with these blogs* that I have decided to take a week off.  We self employed answer to no one (well, obviously the tax man).

Anyway, last week I was enjoying the Indian summer, and I had made a late bid at getting fit for the operation, by swimming three mornings in a row.  I was also doing as many shows as I could, in preparation of my (hopefully short) layoff, due to the operation.  I have passed the jobs I would normally have been doing, on to colleagues, who will reciprocate later in the year when I am fit (a gentle reminder there).   You see, life doesn’t have to be cut throat.

Talking of cuts, I don’t want to be one of those people who talk about their operation.  However, I will say, it seems to have gone well.  Although, I am in agony today just writing this blog – but then again, I am a man, and so my pain threshold is ludicrously low. 

I would also like to say, that the surgeon was very reassuring.  Before the operation he explained everything so well, and I was filled with confidence, that he would be meticulous enough, not to leave anything inside of me after clipping up (they don’t use stitches these days).  He must have been very good, because after the explanation, he returned to my ward to pick up the pen he had been using for the paperwork – and I still had faith in him.

The pre-operation nurses were also brilliant.  Customer relations must be at its’ very best for people who are about to go in for surgery.  I was not disappointed; the ladies were very upbeat, and again put me at ease.  I love to see people really enjoying their jobs. 

All systems seemed to be in place and they were very thorough with the form filling.  When I was asked which religion, I resisted saying “All of them, I don’t want to be caught out on a technicality”.  I treat hospital questions the same way as I treat airline security questions, seriously.

I had a general anaesthetic** for the operation.  Two hours later, I returned to the ward talking gibberish (the effects of the anaesthetic I guess) and feeling as if I had been stabbed in the abdominals (which I guess I had). 

Surgeons are like Super-Heroes who turn up, solve the problem, and leave unnoticed.  It takes years to train to be a surgeon and I like the thought of that.  It is a bit different from a stand up comedian, who even on his first time on stage, is introduced as a funny comedian.

Anyway, he did not strike me as the type who just wandered in and said, “Any one could do this, give me that knifey thing”.

*I am writing nearly 700 words per day – I had promised 500 per day, so, by my maths, I am about 9 to 10 blogs ahead, and so still on target for 182,500 words in the year – that is 500 per day for 365 days.

**I decided not to try the being awake self hypnosis – I suppose I could have checked that the surgeon was performing the operation and wasn’t just doing the old Penn and Teller Psychic surgery trick.  Only a magician would think this way.

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Don performs as a wedding magician, corporate entertainer, and after dinner speaker at events throughout the country. London Magician, Manchester Magician, Liverpool Magician, Birmingham Magician, Newcastle Upon Tyne Magician, Magician Surrey, Edinburgh Magician, Oxford Magician, Bristol Magician, Magician Milton Keynes, Leicester Magician, Leeds Magician, Magician Kent.